I'm in a letting go phase.
I went to my OB-Gyn yesterday for my annual exam, nothing baby related. It was weird to walk in there knowing that unless I had some problem that I'd only be there once a year from now on. It was a reminder that I'm done.
There will be no more babies for me. Mostly I'm okay with this.
You wouldn't know it from the bins of maternity clothes in the attic, the ones I can't quite bring myself to drop off in a Salvation Army box or Freecycle. I've parceled a few things off to one of my sister's friends. I've promised some to a babylost mama friend of mine. I've offered some to a friend from the neighborhood. I feel like I can give them away to somebody I know but not just get rid of them.
You wouldn't know it from the boxes of 0-3 and 3-6 month clothes that I'm trying to pack up. I know they should not go into the attic, but I'm sure that's where they will probably go for a while.
I love seeing Kathleen grow, all the new things she does, the way her mind works. I love watching Elizabeth rolling around, holding her head up, jumping, tasting foods. I'm okay with them growing and changing and moving on to new stages.
I'm still having trouble letting go of the stuff though. Does that mean I'm not really letting go?